homecoming

Heat.
Sizzling heat.
Intense agony: vision blurs;
speech slurs
Mouth cracked as the jagged dirt that covers the seen world.
Every step
a staggered knife into the side of my raw skin that has been scorched by
ten thousand suns.
Every step
A cause for hope.

Forty days wandering the ragged Desert
has led a strong man insane
Every fibre of my being violently whispers dark truths that silently screech
one word

Death.

Nauseating rotting flesh
my blistered neck seeps milky pus down my brailled ribs
sending sharp sight-shattering pains through the cracked skin of my heart-keepers.

Blood
rushes to my head, it has no choice
but to turn its own mass to the now abandoned throne room
Of my once-exalted shepherd who led me beside green pastures.
My heart cries out
part fear
part resistance

I have reached my limit.

I can no longer support my own force
let alone exert any
Forwards, I collapse on my
knees.

My mouth cries out undignified fears.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Scream.

I scream a scream that tears the foundation of Earth.
I scream a scream that unleashes spirits of damnation.
I scream a scream whose power alone could raise dry bones and
make nothing into creation.
I cry a cry that tore the veil of the temple
and that shouted with confidence that it indeed is finished.

See my body is not in my control.
My mind is not its own.
Old desires have gone and the br ok en man who would once force
the strength into being now realises his brokenness
And leans on a comforting staff.

The royal Lion is my king.
The sacrificial Lamb is my love.

I find not my strength in man nor my treasures on Earth.
I have learnt that in giving up all a man gains more
To be led through
the droughts
The Evil
Death and Destruction
Is to be led
Home.

It is with comfort that my body wages war against my soul.
My flesh wants to stay but my soul longs to go.

In this way it is not with sorrow
but with jubilee
that I await my homecoming.

I curse the world as my last sting
I lie in comfort whilst i wait for the serpent-crusher’s final blow
for the lamb that is the hope of this world and the next
to glow in flames of Glory

What waits is far greater than what stays
To leave is to finally arrive
And to be free is to finally see
Majesty

The prodigal is called Home.

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever - Psalm 73